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Pseudoscience Humour |
A fabulous series of cartoons
here
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New Horizons, which is on its way to Pluto, is the
fastest spacecraft ever built. Even so, the trip will take nine years. At
the American Institute of Aeronautics and Astronautics meeting last year, an
award was given for a paper about a new propulsion system that could do it
in a day. So why are we doing it the old-fashioned way? Because it works.
There are two worlds. There is the world that sends robots to explore
Mars, finds a vaccine for cervical cancer, unravels the structure of DNA,
invents Global Positioning, etc. And then there is an alternate world that
discovers cold fusion, homeopathy, the Podkletnov gravity shield, hydrinos,
and the Heim space drive. Inhabitants of both worlds speak similar
languages, look alike, even have identical DNA. It's not just that things
don't work in the alternate world, that can happen even in the real world.
But in the alternate world it doesn't seem to make any difference. - from
WHAT'S NEW, Robert L. Park, Friday, 27 Jan 06
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A Skeptic Moment
(1-min podcast) |
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Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity With New 'Intelligent Falling' Theory
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Well this is refreshingly NON-pseudoscientific!
In fact, doubly-refreshing to rational people:
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From
Monty Python's Flying Circus episode 37,
What the Stars Foretell
Two women, "Mrs. O" wearing glasses, are amazed at the accuracy
of horoscopes -
Mrs. O [reading her horoscope]:
You have green, scaly skin, and a soft yellow
underbelly with a series of fin-like ridges running down your spine
and tail. Although lizard-like in shape,
you can grow anything up to thirty feet in length with huge teeth that can
bite off great rocks and trees. You inhabit arid sub-tropical zones and you
wear spectacles.
Mrs. Trepidatious:
It's very good about the spectacles.
Mrs. O:
It's amazing! |
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Don't know
if these are actually written by children. Yet if they are, how wonderfully
TRUE some of the statements!
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ELEMENTARY BIBLE SCHOOL TESTS
IT COMES FROM A CATHOLIC ELEMENTARY SCHOOL TEST KIDS WERE ASKED QUESTIONS
ABOUT THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS. THE FOLLOWING STATEMENTS ABOUT THE BIBLE
WERE WRITTEN BY CHILDREN. THEY HAVE NOT BE RETOUCHED NOR CORRECTED.
INCORRECT SPELLING HAS BEEN LEFT IN
1.IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE
WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF.
2.ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE. NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN OF ARK.
NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS.
3.LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLA OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING
THE NIGHT.
4.THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH
UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS.
5.SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE
DELILAH.
6.SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES.
7.MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH
IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS.
8.THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP
TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS.
9.THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.
10.THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.
11.MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA. THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN
THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.
12.THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND
STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.
13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT
THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.
14.SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.
15.WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA.
16.WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN
THE MANAGER.
17.JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION.
18.ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD.
19.JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE
THEY DO ONE TO YOU. HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.
20.IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FROM THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE
TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE.
21.THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.
22.THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.
23.ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.
24.ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS
ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE.
25.CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY
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